Is Social Networking, Networking?

Ok, so maybe this is one of those “the old guy just doesn’t get it!” deals but it’s my blog and I can say what I want.  I’m an active user of many of the leading tools and hopelessly behind on some of the newer sites, but what is the best way to use “social networking?”

I find that in many cases individuals that I meet with wear the number of sites and number of contacts as a badge of courage in the race to networking superiority.  I have met some tremendous networkers, but if you believe its all about the technology, you are sorely mistaken.

Here are some thoughts based on habits I’m trying to form (see previous blog on getting back up!).

• Within 48 hours of meeting somebody you want to follow up with:
• Send them a LinkedIn request with a detailed description of where you met and why you want to link.
• An email reaching out to thank them or pass along something you thought they needed.
• Enter their card into your outlook or download their VCF.  Most people don’t have as much information on the social media profile as they do on their card.
• Set yourself a reminder task in Outlook to call them in 30 days.  In that reminder, write a note as to what you can give them when you get together.
• If you don’t meet with them face to face within 90 days, you have wasted your time:
• Just because you have them in your “network” what does it matter if there is no relationship?
• When you meet, focus on how you can help them.  Remember you are plowing the long term ground, not the short term.
• Be careful on Facebook and the like
• Once it is there, it is there forever.  I know you are a high school or college student, but some day you will be an employable person!  Don’t live with any regret!  Employers check this stuff out.

Remember, networking is about relationships, not connecting.  Connecting is a transaction whereas relationships form the foundation of trust.  All good things come from trust.  All bad things come from the lack of trust.

Get Back Up!

Networking for Life – Let’s decompose this one.

Networking – to become a life-long giver and connector of people to solve their individual and business problems. 

For – a preposition with the object or purpose of:

Life – as long as you live.

Notice we didn’t say “networking for” a day, or a month or a year!  A life is usually a long time so what I’m implying is that you need to network forever.  Not “when the economy is bad” or “the economy is good” or “I lost my job” or any one of a thousand reasons.

A week doesn’t go by when I don’t talk to somebody who needs help expanding their network for a myriad of reasons.  The worst one is “I’ve lost my job so I have a little more time.”  Yep, you do!  I don’t try to make people feel bad because to live in regret is a terrible place to live.  What I try to emphasize is that they should use this moment in their life as a reminder to never allow it to happen again.  Life is a long time.  Take the long view and imagine your life richer with a powerful and well connected network of people.

In our firm we record “market touch points” so we can teach every employee how to network.  It also allows us to see how we are doing week to week, quarter to quarter and year to year.  In 2010, the company had 28,000 touch points across the markets we serve.  At Pariveda, networking is just part of what we do every day.  It is one of the first classes we teach and is something that we reinforce at every turn.  As networkers, we have good weeks and bad weeks.  We have days when we are awesome at recording our progress and days and sometimes weeks when we are pathetic.  I’ve had plenty of those days and I’m the teacher!  Failure is an event, it is not a person!  Remember that next time you get knocked down. 

Life is a long time.  Cut yourself some slack.  Start over tomorrow.  Wallowing in it will not make it better.  Everyone takes their eye off the ball from time to time.  We all mess up.  Encourage one another!  Help your friend or colleague back up.  Maybe all they need is a little courage.  Don’t stay down.  Zig Zigler is famous for talking about having a good attitude.  Often he hears the comment “it just doesn’t last.”  He replies “neither does a shower!”

I don’t know how you motivate yourself after disappointment.  I just focus on today.  “I’m going to get better today.”  A friend of mine is good at reminding me that “regret” is yesterday and “worry” is tomorrow.  Live today and network yourself into tomorrow.   Always get back up!

Networking for Life–Literally!

So often we think that networking is about generating leads, interest or revenue.  I would contend that the most valuable networking goes way beyond the day to day and gets individuals making a contribution in life.

This Spring, I was fortunate enough to participate on a relay team that raised money for the Beyond Batten Foundation.  I’d encourage you to go to the website and learn about this terminal disease that affects so many children.

My good friends, Craig and Charlotte Benson, have a beautiful young daughter, Christiane, who has battens disease.  They took a page out of Networking for Life and got busy building a successful foundation to eradicate this disease from the planet. 

A little over a year ago they had a good friend share a vision for how a 95 mile relay from downtown Austin, through the hill country (and overnight!), could raise money to support some recent breakthroughs they were having regarding testing for the disease.  Faith is a funny thing.  Defined as “things hoped for not yet seen” they stepped out and started planning this event.

Run to the Sun was born with high expectations.

Nobody would have believed that a first time fund raiser, for a foundation in its infancy, to support a disease most have never heard of would be such a smashing success:

• 95 Miles Overnight
• 25 Teams
• 250 Participants
• $225,000 Raised

A while back, I wrote about finding a “leaking ship” and contributing to something bigger than you.  This foundation and this event are worthy of your time. 

You’ll never be the same!  Click Here to see the video!

You’ve Got to Kiss A lot of Frogs

A good friend sent this to me today and I thought I’d pass it on…

I took a some liberty to change one word in this bit – “sales” to “networking.”

I have often said in my presentations that in networking 80% of what we do is a waste of time (or feels like it).  If we could figure out what 20% to focus on, we’d have unparalleled success.  Unfortunately, it doesn’t work like that!

“Remember the basic premise of any “networking” endeavor:
“You’ve got to kiss a lot of frogs to meet a prince.”
That’s the job and you’ve got to kiss ‘em. Don’t try
to substitute. You can’t mail them a kiss. You can’t
stay in the office and wait for them to hop in and
kiss you. You can’t let advertising change them into
princes. You can’t ask your assistant to kiss them
(he or she hasn’t got the stomach for it). You can’t
kiss the same one 40 times – it doesn’t take a lot of
smooching to tell a prince from a frog. You can’t
change kissin’ styles every 30 days or spend all your
time in kissin’ school. You’ve got to spend time with
frogs and you’ll find them out there in the marshes.
Then, when you find one, you’ve got to make
contact. Kissing is a contact sport.”

Networking is a contact sport too!  No matter how great the tools are that facilitate our networking – and there are some great tools – eventually, we have to meet people one on one.  I know, sounds like old school to all of you under 30 folks, but trust is developed through shared experiences.  Developing trust is critical to networking, business and personal success. 

So get out there and start kissing some frogs! 

Get Out of that Rut

Oscar Wilde said, “Consistency is the last refuge of the unimaginative.”

So stop getting up at 6:05.

Get up at 5:06.

Walk a mile at dawn.

Find a new way to drive to work.

Switch chores with your spouse next Saturday.

Buy a wok.

Study wildflowers.

Stay up alone all night.

Read to the blind.

Start counting brown-eyed blondes or blonds.

Subscribe to an out of town paper.

Canoe at midnight.

Don’t write your congressman, take a whole scout troop to go see him.

Learn to speak Italian.

Teach some kid the thing you do best.

Listen to two hours of uninterrupted Mozart.

Take up aerobic dancing.

Leap out of that rut.

Savor life.

Remember, we only pass this way once.